Timesheets!

I hate timesheets! For most of my working life I’ve been using timesheets that you’d think by now, I’d be immune to them. Being self-employed means I have to account for every hour (minute even) that I work before I get paid. I completely understand the justification of it and in theory it really is a good idea but for some reason, I still hate doing them.

At the moment, there are some days when I do a bit of work and then my daughter needs the toilet (we are in the midst of toilet training and so I drop everything when she says she needs to go!), I take her, come back and something else has popped up so I get distracted and start doing that as it seems small and I think I can do it quickly. But then, before you know it, the whole day has gone and I’ve not recorded what I have done and how long it has taken me except that I know I’ve been working all day.

On days like that, the best thing to do would be to try and remember everything and write it down while I still remember. Obviously, I don’t! I faff around and think I’ll write it up tomorrow because I won’t forget. I’ve tried using a phone app, pen and paper and spreadsheets. Nothing seems to tempt me into writing up my timesheet. Considering that I like writing so much, you’d think I’d love this opportunity to write down every last detail of what I’ve done in the day.

In the end, I check the emails I’ve sent on those days to recall what I did, I check the audit function of the accounting packages I use and I get there. I bet if it was called something else, I’d happily sit there and complete it. Or maybe it was because I was attempting to work from my mum’s house this week. I think I just need to get my mind around it and maybe call it a blog!

The perfect child

When you become a parent, you find there is so much literature about parenting and none of them seem to agree. Plus there’s always new research going on and so articles are always coming out on how to be a good parent. Recently, a Harvard report stated that mums who went out to work had daughters who achieved better at work. So it’s a good thing to go out to work. But I work from home, so it’s that the same thing? I want to be closer to my daughters especially when you hear news of grooming, kidnapping etc I think if nothing else I want to be able to physically protect them as much as I can. The next article that came out was in the guardian about how women shouldn’t rush back to work and stay at home to look after the kids. In principle that sounds good but not everyone can afford to do this and even this makes me feel guilty. Although, I’m at home, in not always playing with them or looking after them because I’m working. Ever since I started reading about parenting, there’s apparently been this big debate about attachment parenting versus putting them in a routine. With my oldest daughter it was more routined with my youngest it became more of an attachment parenting more due to circumstances rather than anything else. They’re both different but I feel guilty about the way I treated them when they were both young. Every time they misbehave I wonder if I’ve done something to damage them which is why they are acting the way they are. Then I think back to my parents and grandparents and think that somehow we’ve all come through childhood, maybe slightly damaged but somehow we’re ok. I might not have everything or be able to do everything we want but generally things are pretty good. Just need to stop worrying so much.

“Our children are only ever lent to us. We never know just how long we will be able to keep them for. So kiss them, cuddle them, praise them and hold them tightly. But most of all… tell them you love them everyday. ” – Carly Marie

Almost forgot….

It’s Friday! I almost forgot to do this post! The routine I had planned went out the window this week. I had set my alarm clock for 5.30 every morning but only managed to wake up once.

Monday, I snoozed my alarm clock, it is Monday after all!;
Tuesday, my youngest woke up so ended up trying to put her back to sleep;
Wednesday – I went Bikram Yoga so I had to get up;
Thursday, for some reason I was awake at 2.30am and didn’t fall back asleep again til after 5.30;
and Friday, I woke up but didn’t do anything useful and just lay in bed.

Oh well! Start again next week. I can’t wait til the girls start sleeping through the night and stop being scared of everything in the dark. I feel a bit not with it to be honest. Bad news just seems to keep coming through but not ready to talk (or blog) about it yet.

As usual, I thought I’d end this blog with a quote:
‘Happiness is not a station to arrive at, but a manner of travelling.’ Margaret Lee Runbeck

Eclipse Day

I’ve started writing this in almost pitch black at 9.30 am as the eclipse takes over any natural form of light! I am interested in the eclipse but without the special eclipse glasses I’m too scared of it damaging my eyes so I’ve got the TV on in the background.

Starting to get into a bit of routine but its not perfect and while the girls are still small, I don’t think I ever will. I still don’t feel like I’m doing as much exercise as I would like to but I am fasting on Thursday which is, if nothing else, helping with my self control which sometimes spills over into the rest of the week and I’m not getting tempted to snack as much. Today I got up at 5.30 to do some yoga and it felt good and most days I’ve been naturally waking up between 5.30 to 6 so I’m thinking of making that into a bit of a routine.

I didn’t go to Bikram yoga over the weekend and I missed it so much. When I got back to class on Wednesday I felt like an addict, I couldn’t wait! At the moment I’m only going in once a week and the weekends if I’m free but with getting busy with work and changes in class timetable I guess I will have to be happy with once a week! I really love Bikram yoga and I really wish had more time to do it more often. I never want to stop going.

I mentioned I got my phone upgraded last week. The phone I got was Samsung note 4. I like the big screen and the big size in general and for everything except answering the phone it is brilliant. I just need to get used to have such a big phone on my ear. I don’t really use the note part as I have Evernote but I plan to download some kids films which should be useful in emergencies!

Anyway, a quote from my yoga (Mandy Ingber) DVD:
‘If I want to make a change in my body, it starts with a change in my mind’ or something like that.